The College Fix

There’s nothing like a good stout glass of eggnog, a crackling fire, and a solid Christmas movie to get the Holiday season going. Some are funny, other sentimental, and occasionally a few are utterly ridiculous. No matter the message, every Christmas movie from “Miracle on 34th Street” to “Santa Clause 9: Part 3 and ½, Tim Allen’s Demise” has attempted to bring cheer and good tidings to all who view them, making the “Christmas Movie” a lovable genre all in itself. However, amongst the countless films that make up this genre, only 3 are good enough to make the premiere list:

1. Christmas Vacation

Christmas Vacation is one of the more funny movies ever directed. Chevy Chase as Clark Grisswold finds himself having to entertain the extended family over the holiday as he attempts to make it the “hap-hap-happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny f—— Kaye.” A movie that perfectly captures the quintessential family Christmas chaos that inevitably occurs when an entire extended family is thrown together under one roof, Christmas Vacation is a timeless classic (since 15 years ago) that never fails to get laughs.

Whether it be Eddie finding a fine Christmas morning, and a well-groomed front lawn to be the perfect time and place to empty his Winnebago septic tank or Uncle Lewis catching his toupee on fire to the “Pledge of Allegiance,” this movie is absolutely a hilarious must-see.

2. A Christmas Story

Directed in 1983, this movie has perhaps become in the past three decades, dare I say, the quintessential Christmas movie. Following the narrative, introspective story of Ralphie and the Parker family Christmas in 1948, a Christmas Story is artfully written and undoubtedly entertaining, funny, and meaningful.

When Ralphie asks for the highly coveted “Red Ryder BB Gun,” a symbol of undeniable masculinity and ultimate kid-power, he is answered bluntly by a slew of crushing answers, all ringing with the air of parental denial: “you’ll shoot your eye out, kid.” However, Ralphie is ruthless in his attempt to acquire this beautiful weapon as he skillfully unravels the personalities of his stubborn father, selfless mother, and hopelessly pathetic younger brother through a brilliant narrative of witty and artfully crafted prose. From his accounts of his father’s infamous battle with the radiator, the disastrous Bumpus Hound incident, and the Chinese restaurant’s rendition of “Deck the Harrs with Barrs of Horry,” Ralphie makes A Christmas Story one of the best screenplays and, subsequently, movies of all time. If you haven’t seen it, you can’t miss it, there’s an entire CHANNEL devoted to playing this movie 24/7 throughout Christmas.

3. It’s a Wonderful Life

An extremely moving and intimate account of love, loyalty, and ultimate goodness, It’s A Wonderful Life is a, well, wonderful movie for all to enjoy. Directed by Frank Capra, this movie has often been criticized for its cheesy portrayal of good over evil, love over hate, and life over death, yet, it is important to remember that all of us could use a touch of heart-warming innocence during the Christmas season, a season defined by kindness, charity, and benevolence…(Okay, calm yourself Tiny Tim). But seriously, It’s a Wonderful Life is an extremely powerful account of George Bailey, his struggle to find a reason for living, and his ultimate realization of gratitude and thankfulness at a time when the Great Depression threatened all hope and jolliness, even during the Christmas season.

A classic tale the “little guy” pitted against the overwhelming machine of “big business,” and the ensuing struggle, It’s A Wonderful Life perfectly captures the spirit of Christmas and its unifying power.

Honorable Mention:

4. How the Grinch Stole Christmas

Animated version or Jim Carey’s acid trip rendition, either way there’s no way to make this movie less mind-blowing.

5. A Christmas Carol (George C. Scott, 1984 rendition).

6. Elf

Don’t jam 11 cookies into your VCR, just watch it on DVD.

7. Home Alone

8. Jingle All the Way

9. Miracle on 34th Street (1994)

10. A Charlie Brown Christmas

John Kinzer is a staff writer for the Boston College Observer. He is a contributor to the Student Free Press Association.

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